Today is a big day – Church . I have been once since June and its time to get back- I actually was ready to go last week but my son took sick as the very last minute. Theres a lunch after so im feeling a bit stressed by the thought of it
Its a bit of a shock to the system when you start to come out of the fog to find that while the world in a sense stopped – it actually didnt – People carried on , a bit like when you bump into a friend you havent seen for a long time – their baby is now running around, practically ready for school , your aware that time has passed but now how long .
it was spring now its autumn kind of thing and i dont know how it happened . I sort of know it was march and now its september – very little in between connects – you can only blame meds so much . I have lost a couple of real life friends in this time , and a heap of on line ones . Some have battled on regardless on the reaction they got or failed to get . Gosh must have been tough for them . We all need affirmation in what we do , whether its work or relationships . I know she is my friend because …………
we have fun
we do things
shes there for me
we cry we laugh
well im sure they didnt get much feed back from me for a lone while but im so blessed by them hanging in there. I dont think one will know how much it meant her just to texts telling me what was going on in her life – some not great but it till made me feel valued – Thanks Hun
We walk down the street , we bump into people we havent seen for an age and we ask they how they are . Fine they reply , we dont wait for the answer and this is on a good day . On a bad day we mighten even ask . Unaware that the persons painted smile stuck on is covering more pain and heartbreak that we can imagine.Oh maybe we do but dont want to open the can of worms that might follow. I guess im that person at the moment , theres a lot of us out there .
This blog has been my painted smile – a smile i havent managed to hold on for the last 6 months , i dont think i even will again – but with Gods grace maybe i can start being honest
At the moment , for the last 2 years life has Sucked – time to get better